Note to the coalition

The optimal Australian political strategy would be to remain vaguely competitive without actually winning an election.

There’s no upside to being in government. You have to work harder, everyone throws shit at you, you get blamed for shit that has nothing to do with the government, and you get fat and unhealthy from eating too many unwanted meals.

Arguably you get a few more dollars: ministerial perks, post career brown paper bag directorships, actual brown paper bags, etc. But the NPV of those dollars is very negative my friend, on any sensible basis of calculation.

But then, if you could do that maths, you’d never had gone anywhere near politics in the first place, eh?