Diction itchin

If you tap into Google something like ‘how to get rid of an addiction’, by Jesus you get some rubbish coming back at you.

For example, ‘7 ways to get rid of an addiction’ starts with ‘1. Self-determination…’.

Others suggest starting with a pen and paper, with which to make lists. Lots of them. Nuh.

Here’s the real path:

1. Indulge in your addiction until you are destitute and/or physically sick. This will give you the much-needed motivation to change.

2. Talk to someone wiser than yourself in order to understand the root cause of your addiction. We are all shit at analysing ourselves, so don’t bother trying.

3. They’re slippery hypotheses, these on the subject of your own psychology. Keeping them in your mind just doesn’t work. Write the thing down and read it every day.

4. Buck up your pride; you have to talk to everyone in your life about it too. All of them, the people that is. Ad nauseum. Bore the fuck out of them.

5. Then, and only then, you start the avoidance habit. If drinking is your problem, drink a little less. Go for the record number of days. And don’t forget, bore everyone with the details.

6. Keep at it. Don’t get too disheartened when you relapse, which you will. Restart, reset, when you need to. All the way back to step 1 if needed.

7. Eventually you will get there. Or not.

8. Oh, and read Mark Twain on the subject. Some bad habits are very useful as they will save you later in life when you need to give something up to get well. And the way to quit is to quench the desire rather than the act.