Eggplant

So this bearded bloke in overalls was selling “artisan melanzana”. I had to ask..

Italian for eggplant

Organic with visible flaws

Special weirdo small variety

Washed in distilled water

Picked by virgins under a full moon, all genders btw

Packed in tissue paper and carted in reusable old school wooden boxes

Also displayed in said wooden boxes with chalk board pricing reminiscent of the great depression,

And it was fucking expensive…