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I’m doing ok in this relationship. Better than ever before. And truthfully, Nic is like a synthetic construct that I dreamed up. So it’s as good as it gets for me. I hope sincerely that it’s good for her as well. She says it is. Deep down however I can’t help feeling that I’m not that good at this. Actually I’m not that good at being a social animal in the human sense, period. Character mixed with too much learning had pushed me into a cynical corner from where I can barely tolerate the society that I depend upon for my continued survival. I have some residual caring, but these are depleting as quickly as my wealth.Where it ends I don’t know. Hopefully I’ll die before my system revolts against the addiction of living amongst the fools. It’s a shame it’s come to this. But the subject matter simply doesn’t bear as much deconstruction that I’ve given it. Oddly though, I can retain my humor despite it all. That’s a blessing that I don’t deserve and didn’t work for. I’m just one act of God away from complete destitution and the thought of that scares me not one whit. Here’s hoping my incredible luck holds up for Viv and Lola’s sake!