Martyr

I was thinking about judging and being judged and it occurred to me that my natural inclination is to pull back when I am being judged in the pejorative.

This, because of compassion for both the judgey one and for myself. It’s often best to give everyone a break.

But it’s a two edged sword, this behavior.

Selfishly one could argue that there’s always something to be learned from being judged. Not always, but sometimes.

And for the judgey one there’s something to be learned from someone that ignores a judgement. Very occasionally.

And in a way, pulling back could be just absorbing the judgment and using it to self-judge by the metrics of another. Martyrdom.

Maybe in future I will attempt to appreciate what the judgey one dislikes in me, rather than just ignoring it.

And also, maybe I’ll engage to the degree that I can understand their judgements. What are their assumptions, world views, values, emotions, rationale, and conclusions? A little deconstruction, so to speak.

I’ll never agree with everyone but I may be able to eradicate disagreement within myself.