Alice’s Restaurant revisited

We had two extra council garbage bins because of a series of fortunate accidents. We should have one for two houses, and we actually had three.

Officially, one person in a flat has the same bin space as 8 people in two houses. How does that make sense?

Bloody useful, having three bins though because we could throw more shit out. The bin was always full. Green and caring we ain’t.

But then I decided to get one of the bins replaced because the older one was cracked and had a hole.

Because we leave it on the street and dog walkers use it to dispose of their little bags of shit, it stunk, further reinforcing the need for it to stay where it was on the street. Public service and all that.

But of course those holes were a smelly fly-ridden maggoty problem which is why I asked to get it replaced.

And the council, god bless them, did so, free of charge.

And then some dickhead borrowed the new bin and didn’t bring it back.

Now I didn’t know if that was the council that took it, or some neighbour with bad karma.

If it were a neighbour then I would be really enraged – that does not pass my ethics test.

So I went for a whirl on the bike and found a couple of candidates with 2026 printed on their bins. So I know who to suspect but I have no way to prove a case against the cunts.

Bravely I asked the council for a replacement – the risk being that they reduce the two houses to one bin, which just wouldn’t work. I would have had to go steal a new bin from somewhere else in the neighbourhood (lol).

But god bless them, a new bin turned up today, free of charge.

This time I sprayed “39” all over it.